


Confessions of the Dark

by WinchesterTommo



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bisexual Dean, Coming Out, Established Castiel/Dean Winchester, Fluff, M/M, Pansexual Castiel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-18
Updated: 2015-10-18
Packaged: 2018-04-26 22:24:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5022847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinchesterTommo/pseuds/WinchesterTommo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I just really headcanon pan Cas and bi Dean</p>
            </blockquote>





	Confessions of the Dark

Castiel’s sexuality was a concept that didn’t come easily to him. As an obedient angel, he never put much thought into it. He felt how he felt, but it didn’t matter, he did what he was told to do. He was a good little soldier who didn’t let himself indulge in human thoughts like that. But then he met Sam and Dean. Then he started to rebel and he fell and became human. That was when he really started to think about it. He knew he was attracted to women. He had had sex with a woman and found women appealing. But he also knew he was attracted to men. Dean was solid proof of that. Even as an angel, he had found Dean Winchester beautiful. But there was more to it than that. Cas was attracted to people in general. Not in the way that he found everyone he met attractive, but in the way that he didn’t really acknowledge gender when considering his attraction to a person. To him, it was an irrelevant part of a person’s appeal. At first, he had thought he was bi. The way Dean had explained it when he came out to Cas kind of explained how he felt, and for a while, he accepted that. He came out to Dean, then Sam, the only two people he truly cared about. But the more he thought about it, the more his sexuality seemed to be something more. He began looking into it when he got the chance. He researched sexualities he hadn’t even heard of before, reading definitions he had found on google. Then he came across something that made sense to him. A definition that explained what he felt for people. Pansexual. The word was foreign on Castiel’s tongue as he tried it out for the first time while looking at himself in the mirror. It was a sort of name-face association he was trying to build for his own self acceptance. Not limited in sexual choice with regard to biological sex, gender, or gender identity. He mulled over the definition in his head, the words just making sense for him. It was like the last piece of a confusing puzzle was finally in place. So he told the person who needed to know the most. 

“Dean,” the name rang out in the darkness as it left Cas’s lips. There was a small pause, and at first Cas thought Dean was asleep. He was ready to accept that he'd tried and failed and call it a night when Dean shifted a little and responded. 

“Yeah?” Dean’s voice was thick with sleep as he questioned Cas, making him unreasonably anxious. Every logical part of his mind told him it would be fine, but it was times like this that he let irrationality fill him with fear.

“Do you remember when I told you I thought I was bi like you?” his voice was small but clear in the confines of the room, the small space holding their secrets and tucking them discreetly away in the dark.

“Yeah, I remember,” the statement came out in a questioning tone, asking Cas what was wrong without actually saying the words. 

“I think I was wrong,” Cas paused, breathing in and trying to repress the paranoia that danced in the back of his mind. “I think I’m pansexual,” Cas felt flooded with emotions. It was like admitting the words made it official, like he was signing a contract and sealing his fate. People would either accept it, or push him away, and he had to deal with the consequences no matter what they may be. 

“Okay,” the word came out gentle and accepting, letting Cas know it was going to be okay. Cas let out a breath of relief. The one word response may not seem like an open-armed embrace, but it was. In typical Dean Winchester fashion, he was explaining all his support for Cas without actually saying it. Cas had imagined so many different kinds of rejection in his head, but instead he was met with complete and utter support. The feeling in his chest was something he couldn’t explain, all Cas knew was that he was overwhelmed with happiness. 

“You’re okay with that?” a tone of disbelief was laced in Castiel’s voice, making Dean bring his hand up to Cas’s cheek in the dark. 

“Of course, Cas. I will always support you, okay? Your sexuality doesn’t define you. It makes you no better or worse than you were. I refuse to let something as petty as who you love define what I think about you or anyone else, you got that?” the speech came soft and breathy, but the sincerity behind it filled Castiel with a feeling of absolute safety. He paused and let himself take in that feeling, bottling it up for times when he felt scared. 

“I love you,” Cas let the familiar phrase role off his tongue in response, but it somehow felt like it came up short. The feeling Dean’s acceptance had brought to him was too much to try to express in those three simple words, so when Dean easily responded with an I love you back, Cas went on. “I love you,” the words were more forceful this time, every ounce of Cas’s emotion pouring out into the phrase. “You’re so perfect and understanding of me in every way. You’re kind, even when you think you’re not. You’re selfless. You’re everything I could have ever asked for in a person. I am so lucky to have you.” Dean paused slightly at the words, but was soon pressing a kiss onto Cas’s forehead, one that Cas could feel Dean grinning into. 

“You’re not so bad yourself,” Dean light-heartedly tossed back, but Cas could hear the fondness in Dean’s voice. He chuckled and snuggled in closer to Dean, breathing in his scent. 

“Wow, thanks,” Cas could practically feel Dean grinning through the darkness, and his heart melted at the sound of the soft chuckle Dean let out.

“Anytime,” the two let their content hearts mingle as they intertwined their limbs as much as possible. Their even heartbeats were seemingly in time with one another and Cas let the feeling of it lull him to sleep. As he edged the brink of sleep, he felt a pair of lips on his forehead and heard soft, groggy words from Dean.  


“I love you, too,” he slightly mumbled and settled in to join Cas in the relief of sleep.


End file.
